One of the hardest things for any human to do is admit that they did something monstrous - that they destroyed someone else's life, by their own actions. So they come up with all sorts of ways to get out of that fact: Deflection - it was someone else's fault. Fake apology - I'm sorry you feel that way. Attack - Either You're lying! I never did that! or Grow up, get over it! Denial - I never did that; it's a figment of your imagination. Etc. This is why we forgive - to get ourselves off the hook. Because the truth is, most of the time you don't get an apology, and the even harder truth is that no apology is ever enough, because no apology will change what happened, and that is what we really want.
On Jan 5, 2020 CroneEver wrote:
One of the hardest things for any human to do is admit that they did something monstrous - that they destroyed someone else's life, by their own actions. So they come up with all sorts of ways to get out of that fact:
Deflection - it was someone else's fault.
Fake apology - I'm sorry you feel that way.
Attack - Either You're lying! I never did that! or Grow up, get over it!
Denial - I never did that; it's a figment of your imagination. Etc.
This is why we forgive - to get ourselves off the hook. Because the truth is, most of the time you don't get an apology, and the even harder truth is that no apology is ever enough, because no apology will change what happened, and that is what we really want.