both of our two doors, the only entrances into our home, were inhabited by mothers. At the front door was a house finch sitting on five eggs in a nest hidden inside the winter’s Christmas wreath; at our side door was a mother robin, sitting on four eggs in the same nest she used last year. These birds chose to nest on our house, I assume, because they felt safety in our proximity.  It happened for the first time the year before, in mid-May. Dan had hung an old pair of olive green work pants from the light fixture on our side porch in case they had ticks on them. The next afternoon, when he went to shake them out, a robin shot out from behind the light and went squawking into o... posted on May 27 2024 (6,199 reads)

wanted them to stay in their bodies and to feel what their bodies were telling them. I didn’t want them to avoid their truths by talking it away or just petting the horses. The horses wanted to help heal, but they could only do that if the people were open to receive. Some people quickly found the horse they connected to and began a powerful communication. Others stood back and observed. There is no wrong way to connect, and it is always a privilege to watch as people discover what works for them in that moment. Suddenly, the horses all became restless at once. I could feel why. The hair on my arms was standing up. I knew we were about to experience an intense summer storm.... posted on Jun 4 2024 (4,813 reads)

delete my social media but felt its pull. I knew I would miss out on friends’ and artists’ posts. Stuck between deleting it and keeping it, I stumbled upon a New York Times article about the “Luddites.” The Luddite Club community is an NYC-based club of teenagers who reject social norms by “self-liberating” themselves from social media and phones. Their catchphrase is “Don’t be a phoney.” The original “Luddites” were a British workers movement named after, and possibly led by, Ned Ludd, a man whose existence is still questioned. There isn’t any evidence of his influence except for members of the movement claiming thei... posted on Jun 15 2024 (3,062 reads)

ruminative thinking can make it hard to see reality as it is, keeping us locked into negative thinking patterns that don’t serve us. When that happens, our mental health may be compromised; we may lose sleep, have trouble concentrating, or feel lethargic and depressed. What can we do instead? There are many tips for transforming rumination into something less toxic and even useful. Here are a few tools I’ve found helpful in my own life—and that research suggests can work for those of us prone to rumination. Practice mindful awareness Creating a little separation from your spinning thoughts can help transform them into something more manageable. By becoming an ... posted on Jun 13 2024 (3,748 reads)

seen in Parade - January 1, 2012) I’ve received quite a few nice notes and letters from people who saw my piece in Parade. That piece was necessarily much shortened, because of space limitations, so I thought I’d share an earlier draft with those who have taken the time to come to this page. Here goes. “Knowing that you had to work on Thanksgiving, of all days, I thought I’d express my gratitude that you have taken the time and made the effort to learn my name and greet me each day in a way that makes me feel like a person instead of a number.  It’s a small thing, but on any given day, it can make all the difference.  Thank you!” I sent th... posted on Aug 18 2013 (100,986 reads)

that sustain life. To be clear, solutionaries are not the same as problem-solvers (which is why the word can be helpful). Engineers can solve the problem of blowing up a mountain for coal removal, but that does not make them solutionaries. Embedded in the definition of solutionary is the imperative to consider the impacts of our solutions on all life and to strive to avoid causing unintended harm. Solutionaries are also not the same as humanitarians. Humanitarians relieve suffering and work to mitigate harm, which is a deeply worthy endeavor. Solutionaries take humanitarianism a step further by addressing the causes of suffering and harm so they do not persist.  Solutiona... posted on Jun 27 2024 (2,743 reads)

toward a gentle homecoming to the seasonal nature of my own life – of our lives.Before moving to Chile, I lived an incredibly fast-paced life in the realms of international business. My career in sustainable business was a far cry from the childhood lived on an organic farm in rural Pennsylvania, where the rhythm of my days was guided by the needs of the horses, the soil and the rest of the always-growing plants and animals. As a child, there was never a need to seek rest, even though we worked hard every day. The animals, the plants, the forest, the creeks and the sky beckoned us with countless invitations to pause, breathe and simply be – and so we did, with ease.Adulthood tri... posted on Jun 28 2024 (2,347 reads)

agreeing to go out to the store alone at ten, agreeing to do all kinds of things I didn’t really want to do. I shivered a little with self-pity. [Photo: New York City At Night, ca. 1935 from Wikimedia] Manhattan in the 1980s was a gritty place. I used to think of it as having a dark glamour but no more. A few years before, I had come to Manhattan like someone drawing close to a fire. I wanted to be warmed, enlightened. But nothing turned out the way I hoped, not love, not work, not life. I pictured myself a waif huddling along in a bleak neighborhood, bringing her own pasta to dinner. The image was so pathetic that I savored it, a fragment of a modern Dickens tale. I ... posted on Jul 3 2024 (5,925 reads)

they engaged in in their everyday lives. First, participants reported on whether they’d consumed anything between survey times (within the prior two hours, approximately)—in other words, eaten food, drunk alcohol, smoked, watched TV, gambled, gamed, used social media, and more—as well as how much and for how long. If they had consumed something, they also reported where it happened, whether it conflicted with personal goals of theirs (for example, they were gaming instead of working), how much they’d expected to enjoy the activity versus how much they actually enjoyed the activity, how satisfied they were after consuming, and how distracted they were while consuming... posted on Jul 16 2024 (2,631 reads)

44, Peter Lawrence walked away last year from a well-paying job as a manager at Hewlett-Packard. These days he does not work. He doesn’t have to. Peter has retired. His mornings are unhurried. He sits in front of a picture window at his sixth-floor Santa Clara condominium to a view of nearby redwoods and beyond the trees, the Mount Hamilton Lick Observatory, a gleaming white speck on distant mountains. Envious yet? Retirement is within anyone’s reach, he said, if we all consume less. He lives without furniture or a bed, keeps one pot, one pan in the kitchen, and instead of surfing a television with 200 cable channels, watches the changing colors of the sky from his windo... posted on Apr 17 2009 (21 reads)

general habit. As I opened my eyes, I saw the most unusual thing -- this young man was preparing a bite from my plate. My plate! [Laughs]  Sensing my confusion, he offered a gentle explanation: “I grew up with the idea that if you want to be connected to something, you should make an offering to it. I wanted to be part of your prayer, so I thought, what better way than to share in your meal?” And with that, he extended that bite to me! Wow. Curious, I asked him what kind of work made him come alive. With a wisdom far beyond his years, he told me a story – story of a little sparrow. “The sparrow,” he began, “heard that the sky was falling, and whil... posted on Sep 17 2024 (3,773 reads)

they wanted to avoid. At this point, we might conclude that we should let go of our lofty goals to become happier. Maybe it is not in the cards for us and we should let go of the goal, and make do with whatever happiness scraps fall to us. But this conclusion does not accord with a large body of research that examines whether and how people can become happier. Take, for example, UC Riverside psychologist Sonya Lyubomirsky’s research, which has found that happiness interventions can work in helping people be happier, at least sometimes. Meaning, when people want to feel happier, they can get there. The mystery is further deepened in that Lyubomirsky and her colleagues found this ... posted on Oct 8 2024 (2,195 reads)